The Little Lord had been placed on his back in his cot, gently as you would with any precious cargo. Creeping down the stairs, tiptoeing (to the degree that mummy may well be doing a ballerina pose) she opened the living room door as quietly as she could. An insurmountable squeak that ordinarily couldn’t and wouldn’t be heard by tiny ears suddenly becomes the reason that the Little Lord raises an eyelid- it’s as if he was waiting for a reason to waken, like the last half hour of gentle shushing, patting and general reassurance hadn’t occurred. The Little Lord had a short memory it seemed.
Holding her breathe and silently cursing the door whilst also eyeing daddy up who had previously promised to lubricate the god-forsaken piece of wood, mummy continued to enter the living room in the hope that the tiny eyelids upstairs would lower by themselves. A hope that mummy knew was quite unlikely, she sat on a hope that was completely at the mercy of the Little Lord and all his power. No doubt the Little Lord savoured this power and opportunity to keep mummy and daddy at his tenderhooks. It was parental bootcamp day 1 with the Little Lord. As previously threatened in The Little Vampire Lord vs. The Sun and the Little Lord never broke a promise.
Sitting on the sofa next to daddy, they hovered over the monitor and peered at the once serene Little Lord, who was looking directly at the camera on his monitor, like he knew he was being watched. Clever Little Lord. He looked like he was contemplating the activities on tonight’s boot camp. Would he be sympathetic?
It is then, at the moment when mummy and daddy are ready to take some time to relax, that the Little Lord decides he would like to practice the new tricks he’d learnt during his latest leap, he always waited for the opportune moment to pull his moves. And so it began, he rolled with perfect accuracy from his back laying position, to his front. Eyeing up the camera in triumph. He looked like he had conquered the world, (or his previously comfy cot lying position.)
But wait… what was this, the Little Lord – mid roll, had mysteriously forgotten how to roll back onto his back, this was his challenge it seemed, tonight’s boot camp exercise would be the to and fro of mummy and daddy rearranging the Little Lord in his slumber pit, so that he could re-assume his comfy cot lying position.
But mummy and daddy always kept a trick up their sleeves, so as to cover most eventualities, and the Little Lord had previously promised parental boot camp, but the Little Lord hadn’t considered that baby boot camp could be introduced at the parent’s convenience. Ever so quietly mummy and daddy crept into the Little Lord’s slumber pit, averting his gaze, which featured a mysteriously propped up brow that looked suspiciously sarcastic, daddy pressed the button.
The Little Lord’s own personal baby television roared into action, his cot mobile circled and played gentle lullabies. Daddy left the Little Lord’s room, standing outside, mummy and daddy listened as the battle cries still continued.
A few seconds passed, and the parents could see that the Little Lord was trying to avoid looking at the baby television. Until finally, he cracked under the spell of the lullaby music and a sleepy glaze of wonderment overtook the Little Lord.
The parents relaxed, put the tea on and popped on their latest TV fix. Mission accomplished.
…Until 30 minutes went past and the cot mobile ended. Like we said, the Little Lord NEVER broke a promise.